Friday, September 18, 2015

Flowers Are the Music of the Ground


Flowers are the music of the ground;
From earth's lips spoken without sound.

~Edwin Curran



Wake Up to Liv
e with Desiree Leigh

Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!  

Tuesday, August 18, 2015

How Does the Process of Letting Go Really Work?

Letting Go

Wake Up to Live by Desiree Leigh
Many frivolously and light-heatedly use the words "letting go."  They may say that in order to move forward, you must let go; to have freedom, you must let go; to stop living in the past, you must let go; and to stop destroying your self, you must let go.  But, what exactly does letting go mean, and is this concept as 'simple' as many say as the words roll off their tongues?

A couple of decade ago, I started trying to figure this out--the concept of letting go. I spent thousands of dollars in self-improvement workshops, seminars, lectures, online educational classes, and books trying to understand what others meant when they said, "Just let go."  And, because there was no clear explanation, I kept asking, "How?"  How do you "just" let go when memories and feelings, at many times, overwhelmed me regarding my dysfunctional and abusive past life.  These facilitators, as it appeared, could not explain themselves.  Letting go, to them, as I understood their lectures, was something like dropping a stone from my hand.  That simple, or so it seemed.

So as any good student, I started to just let go using mantras, meditation, and positive affirmations to no avail.  It definitely frustrated me, but it also put me in a position where I started to think that something was wrong with me.  Did I not get it?  Did I not have the talent?  In the end, I felt like an idiot, really, trying to let go, without any clear explanation or understanding of what this statement meant.

During my coaching and counselling career and having great collaborative conversations with my clients, I realized that there is no such thing as "just" letting go.  Letting go is a process that takes time, and the amount of time depends on each individual and each of their experiences in life.  The anger, guilt, hate, shame, sadness, betrayal, and hurt, for example, that we are trying to let go of, took decades to establish.  We gained them through our experiences and we gained them through observing others and their habits.  This all takes time to become embedded within us, so why would we expect that letting go is like dropping a stone?  It's not.

Letting go is a process that takes time.  It takes some practice and it takes diligence--the commitment of continued change and having a great desire within to really let something go.  Let's make something very clear here, though.  When someone lets go, this doesn't mean that dysfunctional relationships are reestablished.  Neither does it mean that the dysfunctional behavior of others is acceptable.  Letting go means that you accept what has happened and you accept the other as they are, but you do not condone it.

As the quote mentions, "we fight to let go."  It's true.  It's not easy to let go.  There is a battle that goes on within during the time of letting go, but with time and with work, letting go, somehow, just happens.  :) Letting go or healing from the past (whether proximal or distal) is not a passive process.  It is an active process in which you are conscious of your thoughts and feelings and you're constantly working to address what comes up.
Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh






Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!  


Tuesday, July 14, 2015

The Pursuit of Mastery


Mastery

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

I finished reading a book called "Drive" by Daniel H. Pink.  I gave it a three to a three and a half star out of five because it could have been more concise.  I found myself scanning quickly over many areas.  I guess it felt a bit redundant in certain areas.  I did find Pink's chapter on "Mastery," however, to be enlightening and something that many people should consider if they want to be a master at what they love.

He mentions in the book that mastery has three laws.  1. Mastery is a Mindset. 2. Mastery is a Pain. 3. Mastery is an Asymptote.  Let me explain numbers 1 and 3 briefly first.

Number 1: Mastery is a Mindset which means that the pursuit of mastery is all in our heads.  Some people, for instance, believe that to be a master at something, such as a painter or sculptor, you need intelligence, and intelligence has a restricted supply that we cannot increase.  Basically, we either have the talent or we don't.  Other people believe that mastery occurs in a regular series with effort which Pink called an "incremental theory."  Ultimately, the more effort and time you put into your project or skill, the more you will become a master at it.  In the end, to attain mastery your mindset must be about effort.

Number 3: Mastery is an Asymptote.  A horizontal asymptote, for example, is a straight line that a curve approaches but never quite reaches it.  Why? Because the curve continues into infinity yet never touching the horizontal line.  As a result, mastery is an asymptote--a goal that you work toward to achieve, but you never quite reach it.  An athlete is a great example for this one.  As an athlete strives to master his/her art he/she gets better with practice, but even at the end of all the enduring and grueling practices, he/she can always be better; thus he/she never quite reaches mastery.

Now for Number 2: Mastery is a Pain is understated in Michelangelo's quote above.  Many people want to be a master at what they do, but they don't really understand what it takes to be a master.  They somehow envision that in order to be a master at something they love that it should feel good or have some sense of ease or grandness to it.  But it doesn't.  Mastery takes time (actually a minimum of 10 years of intense practice!); a whole lot of practice that will probably be difficult, maybe painful, and perhaps even unbearable.  It will be an all-consuming effort.  Mastery takes dedication, persistence, and tenacity to stick with it. There will be times when you feel like you're not going anywhere especially when you plateau, but the masters are the one's that stick with it even when the going gets tough.  To gain the art of mastery you must resolve to do what you desire to do, remember your Why, your Motive, or your Reasons for doing it--what Drives you--and keep going even when you don't want to.  It's going to be grueling at times, and it's going to take a lot of hard work, but no one said that the pursuit of excellence or mastery was going to be easy.  Just ask any Olympic winner, neurosurgeon, or astronaut.

Pink, D.H. (2012). Drive. New York, NY: Penguin Group Inc.


Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh




Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!  

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Wake Up to Live! Enlightenment Is A Destructive Process

Enlightenment Is A Destructive Process

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

I have been extremely straight forward in regards to taking action in something that makes you passionate.  I have been repeatedly stating how important it is to create a voice and stand up for what is right, for a cause, and for truth.  Awakening or enlightenment is not a passive project; it is action oriented.  It take guts and gusto to do what you are intended to do here on this planet to make life better for all.  With your cause and your voice and with other causes and voices, we can make a difference!

Enlightenment is not a passive process.  Enlightenment is action oriented.

Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!  

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Monday, April 13, 2015

Get Political for A Cause You Are Passionate About


Wake Up and Get Political For A Cause You Are Passionate About

Why is the general population so afraid to get involved politically?  Are you afraid of backlash?  Are you afraid that maybe someone won't agree with you, and their comments are going to rock your boat?  Are you afraid of this so called "negativity" people talk about?  Or are you one of those believers that thinks that if I only stay in the Zen moment and think happy thoughts, then life will somehow miraculously change for the better?

We latch on to religion or spirituality when we are overwhelmed; when we can't seem to tolerate the world anymore.  Perhaps, someone close to you died--a spouse, a child, a mother, or a very good friend.  War is another factor to why people latch onto religion or look for a divine power.  People want to know and want to believe that there is something out there that is greater than the mess here on earth, and, honestly, rightfully so.  I went through this myself.

But spiritual awakening is not about sitting in that calm, zen moment and staying there, or gluing a plastic happy smile on your face and losing touch with reality.  Once you become awakened (if that is what you would like to call it), you are now more aware of the world's / people's needs and issues.  This is where you need to get out there and focus on some sort of a cause.  Whatever that may look like.  And guess what, these causes get political!  There is no way to work on a cause without getting political because that is where all change lies.  Politics gets tough; sometimes you feel like you're getting the life squeezed out of you; and it is emotionally draining at times; but that is not what we focus on.

I tell you, Facebook can drive me wild sometimes.  We have so many people out there that are afraid to make a strong point because someone won't like what they say in the comment box.  They'll even say "I don't want to get political" showing endless amounts of cat and dog photos and videos (or photos of their dinner!).  I like these pic's and reels, too, at times, because they make me smile and laugh, but come on, let's do something productive to make some amazing change in the world.

When you wake up from the darkness or you see light or you are cleansed or conscious (there are many ways to describe this awakening process), this is the moment when action must be taken, voices need to be scripted, and perseverance and tenacity needs to be on your back burner at all times.  Sure, show those kitty and puppy photos (and your dinner if you have to once in a while), but also show what is really happening in the world so we can all gain some awareness and perspective on what is "important."

I see many more PETA protests than I see humanity injustice protests.  I see way too many "get rich programs" than I see boycotting psychopaths such as Nestle that is sucking the water reservoirs dry in California (and getting water for pennies here in B.C.).  There is a bit of an imbalance here.  Let's uncover the messes that many so like to deny and hide.  I mean, get this, water will soon be a privilege not a right!!!  Collecting rainwater in your back yard is illegal (or limited in areas!).  Child abuse, sexual assault, sex trafficking, genocides, or LGBT rights, for example, are not talked about enough.  No one wants to get stressed or inconveniences, but change and awareness is about being inconvenienced.  It gets the blood boiling, and this is what creates action.  How did you first become awakened?  I'm thinking something huge happened, and you weren't sitting in a lounge chair contemplating things.

Individualism is good, happiness is good, Zen moments are great, but without freedom in society, without justice for humanity, and without a healthy and safe planet to live on, none of these values will matter!

Wake Up to Live; make a point in the world; create a cause; make a footprint for others to follow.  When will you take action for a greater cause beyond your individual self?  If not now, when? 

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!  


  

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Sacred Domain Filled With Love

Sacred Domain Filled With Love

Wake Up to Live by Desiree Leigh

When you  have been abused, it's not that you don't ever want to be loved by someone.  It's that your demands may be a lot greater than most.  Because of the extra demands, many turn and walk away.  They can't be bothered, I suppose.  But isn't true love worth the effort?

In essence, to love another that has been so deeply and soulfully hurt, it takes more effort on the part of the other trying to enter a sacred domain; perhaps you can call it a wall, but it really is a sacred domain filled with love. Once you enter the sacred domain or when you finally see that there is a whole lot of love within those walls, you climb in there, too, and find out it is truly miraculous.

If you've been allowed to enter the sacred domain, more than likely and perhaps without even knowing it, you've given greater space, time, patience, tolerance, and unconditional love.

 

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh






Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!  

Monday, April 6, 2015

Subtly Supporting Evil In Various Ways



"If I know that something evil is happening I do not do anything to favor it, but I do not do anything to stop it; I look away from it.  Thus, I am passively guilty of supporting the man who perpetuates that evil."

--Gerard Prunier, author of The Rwanda Crisis




Evil by an individual, a group, a state, or a nation(s); it comes in all sizes and by people that you would not suspect.



 Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!  

Sunday, April 5, 2015

Happy Easter

Happy Easter
Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Whether you celebrate the crucifixion and resurrection of Jesus, or you celebrate Ishtar, fertility and procreation, take these holidays to give thanks to life, what life has to offer, and any memories of loved ones that impacted your heart, whether you are religious or not.  

I always look back to memories of my grandparents on my father's side, especially my grandma.  Going to my grandparents home in Raspberry Village was always such a nice event.  Grandma had such good home-cooked food.  She made an amazing raspberry juice, borscht that was out of this world, and pedehi (my favorite was beet or pumpkin).  It was such a delight!  Her home was very welcoming and warm and smelled so inviting.  I'll always remember entering the side door of the house, turning left to climb up the stairs to enter her kitchen.  Every time, she had a loaf of bread, a container of salt, and a clear glass jug full of fresh water.

What I remember most of grandma's place was that she was consistent; I knew what to expect.  She was hospitable, happy and friendly, and always wanted you to leave with a full tummy.  These simple items made seeing her the best thing that happened on weekends.

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh  

Saturday, March 28, 2015

Mind Full or Mindful?

Is your mind full?

Are You Mindful?

Is your mind full of life's stuff as the human on the left of the picture, or are you being mindful of what enters your mind as the dogs illustration is on the right?

Don't be hard on yourself when you are on the left side of this picture.  Life is most often a juggling or balancing act: we go from having a full mind to being mindful.  I guess the most important task is to be mindful that your mind is full and then you can take action and do something about it.  In the end, you need to continually check in, reflect on your thoughts, to see where you are at.

To help promote mindfulness, you also need to nourish yourself regularly.

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh




Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!  

Friday, March 27, 2015

Can the Little Person Make Change?

Can the Little Person Make Change?

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

There are way to many people that say that we can't change things; that the matter is too big and either out of our hands or out of our control to see any movement from the little person.  I totally disagree with this attitude.  (BTW, I mean the little person in the class structural system).

For the naysayers, it's time to start looking at how change happens.  Change doesn't happen by people sitting back and doing nothing or living separate lives from the world around them.  Change happens by getting up and creating a voice about what is important to you and the people around you.

I hear people say: "Don't fuss, it's not worth the energy;" "Why make a big deal out of it.  Life has always been like this;" "Don't worry about something you cannot change;" but this way of thinking is misleading and false.  First, can you imagine if we all thought this way?  No change would happened.  Besides, why are we leaving the change for someone else?  Second, this is exactly how the big guys wants you to think--don't fuss!  They want you to stay passive and quiet and continue with your own life without making a kerfuffle. The thing is, these huge institutional structures of modern capitalism--government officials, business corporations, financial institutions, stock exchanges, and insurance companies--are going to keep making you think this way.  This world and everything that goes on in it, is a big deal and it should concern every individual that lives on this planet because we are all involved; we all reside on this planet.

Don't you want to leave a legacy for your children?  Don't you want to leave the world a better place for your children, your grandchildren, the people you love, or humanity in general?

Sometimes we have this notion that all people are good; that no one intentionally wants to self-destruct or hurt this world, but this way of thinking is misleading as well.  Study psychology of crime and you will understand that not everyone is like you and me.  Some individuals don't (for unknown reasons we may never understand) give a rats-ass about you, me, or the world they live in.  We can define the psychopaths in such a manner.  Have you ever heard about the "white-collar psychopath?"  Psychopaths are actually quite brilliant, manipulative, full of ego and grandiose, and ONLY have their self-interest in mind even when they make it appear as though you are important.  Psychopaths run rampant in the corporate world.  Can you pick one out?  He/she will wine you and dine you, appease you, and tell you that you are the best, but in the end, they have an agenda in mind; an agenda of self-interest.  They don't give a damn about you or the world they live in.  They take what they need, and they don't stop!  It is time that we all become aware of these types of CEO's, corporate presidents, and others in the stock market or any other financial institution.  Of course, not all of them are psychopaths either, but don't you feel we should at least be aware of this?    

Anyways, when you need to make change in your home or your place of employment, your community, city, district, province, the nation, or internationally, start by:


  1. Creating networks of like-minded individuals.
  2. Create a voice and use material to back your information up.  
  3. Don't pull crap out of thin air; it's not viable and you lose credibility.
  4. You need some tolerance to risk.
  5. You must be fully grounded for back-lash.

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh




Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!









Friday, February 27, 2015

Emotional Abuse: What Are the Signs?

Emotional Abuse: What Are the Signs?

Wake Up to Live by Desiree Leigh

Do you recognize the signs of emotional abuse?  You may experience these signs if you are living with someone that physically and verbally abuses you?  You may also experience these signs with others you don't live with, such as brothers or sisters and friends or neighbors.  I wasn't able to recognize the signs immediately.  I was too caught up managing life with my children not considering either my own issues or needs.  I was trying to keep things afloat so that life looked grand from the outside--from the perspective of others--and life did look just fine from the outside; so it was very easy to convince myself that everything was okay.  What's really crazy, though, is that even if outsiders suspected something, they didn't say a word or do anything; everyone lived in this bubble of silence.  This bubble of silence is the craziest thing in the world when you reflect on it, but it happens with child abuse, too!  No one wants to get involved.

These are just five signs of emotional abuse, but they are pretty significant.  If you are in an emotionally abusive relationship, do you think it is the time to start reflecting on what is "really" happening in the relationship.  I know it's hard.  I've been there.  I was scared in my boots.  But by starting to reflect on your life as it really is is the beginning of change.  Reflection and awareness; it's the beginning of truth, and it's the beginning of creating self-worth.

Wake Up to Live by Desiree Leigh





Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!  



Sunday, February 22, 2015

Controller, Abusers, & Manipulators

Controllers, Abusers, & Manipulators

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

In life, we live among a varied population, so we must be able to recognize when we are in danger.  When you have grown up observing domestic violence, have been the subject of childhood abuse or bullying from your siblings, or have been assaulted in any way, we can either be hypervigilant or on-guard to everyone that is around us or we may be unconscious in recognizing the signs of these characteristics.  I know I have been both, but my underlying characteristic is to be hypervigilant and acutely aware of absolutely everything--every facial expression and every pin dropping.  What's important, though, is to recognize the signs by logically analyzing the situation and also staying connected to your gut feelings.

Remember, many abusers, controllers, and manipulators will make the problem yours and tell everyone in their circle of family and friends (and acquaintances) that 'you' are the problem when in fact you are not.  I can compare this behavior to children in a playground: the bully or the one that abuses goes running to an authority figure 'first' so that they look as if they are the innocent ones.  Anyways, the only way to get support and move beyond being isolated from the people you thought cared about you is to reach out to others that you can trust or a group that has experienced the same sorts of things.

I also want to note that it is not about living in fear or being preoccupied or obsessive regarding the people you are around. (Although you may have this exact behavior immediately after a recent attack, and that is both okay and normal).  Just take note of the signs.  If you are not aware of the 'signs,' your own behavior will never change.  Awareness and understanding of how abusers behave and how they condition or groom their victim is significant, and it is for the safety and well-being of yourself and your family.

Wake Up to Live by Desiree Leigh





Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!  

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

    

Saturday, February 21, 2015

Defeat the Darkness to Inspire

Defeat the Darkness to Inspire

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh


Healers are warriors, whether they are spiritual or not, who have found the courage to defeat the darkness buried within their souls or within the very structure and function of their DNA.  

We awaken with wisdom and a new-found strength to encourage and inspire others to rise above their own darkness--like the lotus flower being released from the mud at the bottom of the pond;  first, with awareness, and, second, with action.

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh


Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!  

Friday, February 20, 2015

Betrayed By the People We Love and Trust: Use Management Skills to Surivive

Betrayed By the People We Love and Trust:
Use Management Skills to Survive

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh
Feeling betrayed by the people that we love and trust who did not respond to our cries of abuse is a feeling that may never really go away.  It is something that we need to work on on a regular basis to keep the memories and feelings in check.

Many people talk about forgiveness (even I did sometime in the past), stating how important it is to do in order to move on.  Through some real deep self-examination, I realized I was only following a socially conditioned belief.  What is forgiveness, anyways?  Basically, it is an abstract concept.  We made it up.  And, because it is a concept to understand a generalized idea, we can attach anything to it to fit our needs if we choose.

Many people are socially conditioned to believe that we "must" forgive.  Forgiveness has been a huge hype socialized into us for centuries; a way for society to conform, but also a way for society to behave themselves rather than cause a ruckus.  It is a way to silence society.  Even celebrities and gurus are famous for using this philosophical pathway of speaking and/or living and many people automatically believe them because they are in a position of authority.

When you live with abuse, forgiveness doesn't just make all memories and feeling miraculously melt away.  This is rubbish.  Just try to do that.  Then you feel shamed or guilty because these feelings didn't go away and of course somethings got to be wrong with you, right?  Instead of thinking about forgiveness, think about management.  To get through the day--waking up, eating breakfast, getting to work or school, picking up children at the day care, going to appointments--you manage your day sometimes consciously and sometimes unconsciously.

I must not forget the emotions such as hate and resentment; the one's many call 'negative.'  Perhaps, you might say, "well forgiveness helped me move past these emotions."  These emotions are built within us.  We can pretend they are not a part of us, but they are, and they will always arise occasionally--more in some than others.  If they do arise, what do you do?  Once again, you most likely use your management skills perhaps even in an unconscious manner.

In the end, dealing with memories and feelings from a traumatized past filled with abuse and/or neglect takes management skills.  Forgiveness is an abstract concept that sounds 'nice and pretty,' in comparison to management, so it may also feel better saying it, but in theory you are managing your thoughts and emotions.  Whenever memories and feelings come up, you take action in a proactive manner--such as expression, walking, meditation, an Epsom bath, talking to a friend or your counselor, or writing--so that you can settle those thoughts and emotions and function through the day or even week.

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Life's Most Urgent Question


Life's Most Urgent Question

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh



Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Waking up to live life is about questioning the social norms and the things that feel uncomfortable to talk about.  Wake Up to Live is about becoming awake to our biases, prejudices, and injustices. Waking up to live life is about waking up from unconsciousness to see what is really true.  Although waking up to live life with awareness and clarity may be difficult to do because now we must begin to make the hard choices, we must strive to Wake Up to Live and be responsible for our actions and the actions of others.  We are in this life together!  

Saturday, January 17, 2015

Speak Your Truth Anyway

Speak Your Truth Anyway

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh
Speak your truth, no matter what.  Your truth may not resonate with everyone.  Many of us may even shut down if our truth isn't accepted or acknowledged by others; perhaps, because they feel uncomfortable in the presence of truth.  Do it anyways.

Courage is needed to come forward regarding our truth; don't sugar-coat it.  Sugar-coating the truth only alleviates the other party from their responsibilities.

Everyone that has thus far come forward has had to go through feelings of ambiguity-should I say something or should I stay silent.  Do it anyways; speak your truth despite their uncomfortableness.  

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh  

Sunday, January 11, 2015

Should Science Be Regulated?

Should Science Be Regulated?

Wake Up to Live
with Desiree Leigh

Photograph taken from:
http://www.slideshare.net/MrRyanSIS/natural-sciences-2012-13-14443920

Fukuyama states that “countries must regulate…technology… [to]…discriminate between… technolog[y]…that “promote[s] human flourishing, and those that pose a threat to human dignity and well-being” (460).  Our nation “failed to understand that a…new potential for destruction had been created” with the atomic bomb (459); we decimated thousands of human lives in Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Thus, careful deliberation and scrutiny must occur in the process of scientific regulation.  However, conflicting conceptions in various research projects such as in vetro fertilization, stem cell research, and eugenics makes for challenging legislation.

Louise Brown, in 1978, was the first child born from in vetro fertilization (IVF)—in which multiple fertilized embryos are transferred from a petri dish into a woman’s uterus.  A procedure that was experimental, but gave hope to couples that could not conceive a child (Rosenberg).  The transferring of multiple embryos into a woman’s uterus, however, raised questions because of the risk of multiple pregnancies that could result in medical complications, such as infantile death (“New Study Finds”).  Still, there are no regulations regarding how many embryos can be transferred into a woman’s uterus; there are only guidelines (New).  Because IVF is costly, many women (and doctors) choose to administer multiple embryos into the uterus so that the probability of conception is greater.  Heuy referenced Dr. Keith Barrington’s 2007 study in which he proposed that only one embryo be administered IVF to reduce the risk of multiple births causing infantile death (“New Study Finds”), and since July 2010, Quebec’s fertility centers have adopted Barrington’s method, and thus far “twin gestation rates have dropped from 30% to 3.8%” (Huey). 

Stem cell research holds great potential to treat human diseases, yet their derivation and use raise ethical, social, and legal concerns (“Guidelines for Human”).  In the past, the Human Pluripotent Stem Cell Research, in Canada, “had no laws to govern it, nor were there guidelines for researchers, research ethics boards, or funding agencies on how stem cells may be derived and used” (“Guidelines for Human”).  Because of the concerns, the federal government legislated an “Act Respecting Assisted Human Reproduction and Related Research” in 2004 which applies to the derivation of human embryonic and human induced stem cell research (“Guidelines for Human”).  Researchers, Beeson and Lippman, indicate in their essay that the ardent pursuit in egg harvesting for stem cell research, in which young women are donating and selling their ova for clinical purposes, such as fertility clinics, and non-clinical purposes, such as in experimental cloning studies, are being exploited by these industries for commercialization and is placing women’s health at risk for hyperstimulation syndrome (overstimulation of ovaries) which has been suggested in studies as a link to ovarian cancer (1).  “Biotechnology may have great potential for advancing healing, but in the context of inadequate regulation…, it threatens to convert the bodies of women into instruments for use…” (Beeson and Lippman 8).

In Regulating Eugenics, the Harvard Law Review quoted Francis Galton’s definition of eugenics: “[Eugenics is] the science of improving stock… [and]…especially in the case of man, [it is a method] to give…more suitable races…a better chance of prevailing…over the less suitable [races]” (1579).  Motivated by racism and subjugation, compulsory sterilization laws were enacted in 1907, and by 1956 most states still had this law (“Regulating Eugenics” 1580).  Today, however, “liberal eugenics,” which advocates genetic modification of humans, include the “screening for genes that cause serious disabilities…to genetically engineering smarter children,” (1582) has both proponents and opponents with conflicting conceptions as to whether liberal eugenics should be regulated.  Proponents argue that liberal eugenics respects “traditional liberal values” such as individualism and egalitarianism (1582), but opponents argue that there is poor understanding to this type of technology and that any indiscriminate activity with the human genome could be catastrophic (1584).

Proposed regulation, as Intemann and de Melo-Martin explained, should be value-based meaning that decisions regarding research priorities and methodologies and what regulations to legislate “should not be made solely by scientific or epistemic criteria” (656) or by politicians (658).  The reason for this is that most “scientists are not trained in ethics… [and]…will often have self-interested reasons” and “politicians often have…politically motivated agendas” (657-8).   

More deliberations need to take place to regulate science relating to human safety, ethics, and social values, but the process is complex with numerous conflicting conceptions.  Nevertheless, we must carefully discriminate between new technology for human benefit and ones that threaten humankind, and legislate accordingly. 

Works Cited
Beeson, Diane and Abby Lippman.  “Egg Harvesting for Stem Cell Research: Medical Risks
            and Ethical Problems.”  RBM Online  13:[Unassigned Issue]  (2006): 1-11.  Web.
25 July 2013.    
 “Guidelines for Human Pluripotent Stem Cell Research.”  Canadian Institutes of Health
            Research.  Canada.gc.ca, 7 June 2005.  Web.  25 July 2013.
Huey, Brigid.  “New Study Finds Stronger Regulations of In Vitro Fertilization May Save
Lives.”  Université de Montréal: UdeMNouvelles, 18 April 2011.  Web. 25 July
2013.
Intemann, Kristen K. and Inmaculanda de Melo-Martin.  “Regulating Scientific Research:
            Should Scientists Be Left Alone?”  The FASEB Journal  22:3 (2008): 654-58.  Web.
            20 July 2013. 
New, Jennifer.  “Should In Vitro Fertilization Be Regulated?”  Divine Caroline.  Web.  25
            July 2013. 
“Regulating Eugenics.”  Harvard Law Review 121:6 (2008): 1578-1599.  Web. 25 July 2013.
Rosenberg, Jennifer.  “First Test-Tube Baby: Louise Brown.”  About.com, n.d.  Web.  25 July
            2013.  


Wake Up to Live is about awareness in every aspect.  Wake Up to Live is about eliminating the biases; although it is difficult to do, we must Wake Up to Live, and be responsible for our actions: the actions for ourselves, others, and our planet.  Be sensitive to the cause and wake up to live!

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh