My instincts said to do one thing on the computer, but I over-ruled my intuition, only to find myself in a predicament--in a situation I didn't want. I was down and frustrated without really knowing why, at first, until I did some reflecting. Then I realized I was angry at myself because I knew it was my fault in the choice I made. I overruled my gut which already knew what was right in that moment. And, because I didn't listen to the voice within, I quickly started the negative self-talk.
Over the years, I have figured out which feeling are my intuition talking with me--the ones I should listen to- and which ones are just my thoughts rambling in my head and distracting me. Yet, I have the ability to over-rule my intuition too quickly. It's frustrating to say the least.
I'm being really honest here. I can be so hard on myself that when I actually begin to listen to myself, I am floored to how rude and nasty I am to myself. I would NEVER treat another person as I do myself when I get to this point. Once I finish bashing myself with negative self-talk, you can only imagine where my self-esteem goes?
So, right now, I am saying to the committee that meets inside my head to sit down and shut up. I must be forceful and determined to stop it. I cannot expect myself to be perfect, and, really, that is where the problem lies when I make a mistake.