What Is Directing Your Choices?

What Is Directing Your Choices?
Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

So many realizations on how I have stepped over so many people in my life, carrying the baggage of guilt or shame, always at the back of my mind. This includes my beloved children. As we step over our broken promises and agreements of being a trustworthy friend, a compassionate lover, or a present mother/father, our choices begin to be made unconsciously from the past!

For instance, your son spills the milk and it pours all over the beautiful beige shag rug. In the process of trying to catch the glass before the mishap, mom's glass of red wine gets knocked off the table and and all over her white blouse as well as the floor....She reacts in an irrational manner, yelling or giving the child advice which really is just criticism and blame! Where is this reaction coming from?? Initially, she believes that the reaction supports what happened, also saying, "This is my personality." "This is who I am." At the same time, her son should have been more responsible, payed attention, and knows better. Is her reaction present based?? NO! Something from the past has brought out her reaction.

Another example. You're driving home from a long weekend workshop and someone cuts you off. You swerve away to avoid the collision but inevitably hit the vehicle in front of you. You're stunned, shocked, and angry. You get out of the car and annoyingly confront the driver that wasn't paying attention, and either yell at him/her or sternly show your disgust with him/her. Again you believe your reaction supports what happened, saying, "He wasn't paying attention and he should be told he was being irresponsible so he gets the message through his thick skull." Is this reaction present based?? No! A decision was made in the past creating your behavior today.

Many of us don't make "present" based choices. We make choices from the events that occurred in our past. It doesn't just stop there, though. We make choices from the "decisions" we made to the events that occurred in our past.

I'll explain further. Because of an event that occurred in my past at the age of 2 and then another one at the age of 4, I made the decision that I was dirty, ugly, cheap, unlovable, and worthless. This was an event from my past that impacted me greatly!! There are later events that impacted me and I carried them as well. This was the greatest, though.

As life rolled forward, I carried these feelings with me where ever I went. I brought them into ALL my relationships. My relationship with my mother, father, sisters, brother, husbands, children's, and friends. Can you imagine the impact that I created in ALL my relationships by making this decision of being ugly, dirty, cheap, unlovable, and worthless, from that age?? I carried my past right into my present day making ALL my choices based on that decision I made.

Some events that occurred in the past may have not been so traumatic for others but these events still enrolled you into making a decision about who you are and how you were going to survive life. When you have these feelings about yourself, others pick them up and treat you according to who you believe and feel you are. Amazing, isn't this?? And then we wonder why life doesn't work out for us.

We can change our behavior, so that we don't act irrationally or thoughtlessly, but this kind of an attempt won't last very long. We will go back to our old neuro-patterns that we created years ago. So again, I speak of doing the WORK!! Getting to the SOURCE of where your choices are coming from and raising awareness to them. When the darkness is brought to the light, things "naturally" begin to change. When you raise awareness, you also realize you have conscious choice on what happens in your life. You can continue to allow your choices to be triggered by your past or you can now create an extraordinary life!!

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Meaning

Meaning
by Desiree Leigh, Wake Up to Live

When you take the meaning out of everything, you are left with no-thing. With no-thing, you can create any-thing. When we have meaning depict what we see, hear, smell, touch, and taste, we make judgments or evaluations, and they are ALL coming from the past. No exceptions.

Being in the present moment, without adding meaning to everything, takes you out of the past and out of the future. You are then able to make decisions from WISDOM.

Many friends and clients ask me, "How do I stop the mind-chatter to be in the present?" "That's what's hard." Clean up the mess!! Go to the "source", acknowledge it, and see the distinction between what happened and the story that was formed. The story is the illusion. This creates AWARENESS. From that point you have a CHOICE. You can continue to live within the story and the misery it creates, or you can make a commitment to yourself to let it be and create from NOW.

By doing this, you don't disregard the event that happened to you. I believe this is where most people get confused. The incident really happened! But do you want to continue to have your thoughts and feelings dictate your choices, because that's what will continue to happen when there are unresolved issues that bring up strong emotion?

What this all comes down to is that "you" have to do the WORK! No exceptions. You cannot build a future of freedom, joy, fulfillment, and inner peace with the mess still living within you because at some point in your life it will fester creating dis-ease.

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Broken Promises

Broken Promises
by Desiree Leigh, Wake Up to Live

When we go to the 'source' of unworkability, there is a broken promise or agreement with either yourself or others. Many of us try to avoid the consequences or the potential conflict that may arise in the situation if we deal with it in a straight fashion - if we face it.

When we don't deal with the broken promises or agreements, we begin to strip away our integrity. We become dead or numb, not only to ourselves but to the world. We slide into a fog and overwhelm.

Are you living with integrity from the heart? To reclaim your power, stop stepping over the things that create that chatter in your head. The mind frick that won't go away.

Be authentic and be real with yourself. Begin instilling a new, positive and powerful habit to restore your divinity. With all this mind chatter, we cannot hear the still, small voice from within. Do the work, and you will go from confusion or a deadness to clarity, peace, and freedom.

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Uncovering Your Values

Uncovering Your Values
by Desiree Leigh, Wake Up to Live

There is always a lot of talk about values. I'm sure you have heard these words, "When you know your values and you are aligned with them, you live with harmony. Basically, what this means is that when you honor your values in your daily activities and your goals, you live with joy and peace of mind.

How do you uncover your values, though? That's the question. In my experience, I was living with a lot of baggage, and with that baggage, I had no idea what my values were. I was so afraid to be judged by others, conforming to their opinions and wants, that my values were not only unclear, they were no where to be seen. "What? Values? What the heck are they?"

I know what I 'needed' to do to survive. I lived in an 'identity' that was coming from the past. I 'thought' I had clearly defined values (whatever that meant at the time), but those values were coming from my conditioned past as well as all of societies views and what they thought I should have. My values never came from my true self.

To uncover your true values, you must begin by releasing the baggage you are carrying with you, and have been for many years. The baggage is the old resentments, the broken promises, and the hurt and pain - it is all the burden we like to load on our shoulders. We not only hold onto our own burdens but, we like to take on other people's burdens too! So how are we supposed to clearly define our "own" values?

To uncover "your" values, what is really true for you, begin with meditation. Meditation is the first and most important step to gaining clarity.

Here are some steps to begin the process:

1. Meditation will create clarity and peace of mind.
2. Notice the thoughts that flow. In the beginning, most of them are negative and recurring ones that keep you stuck and confused.
3. Meditation will naturally begin to release the stresses of these recurring negative thoughts, which are a manifestation of your current beliefs and your current environment.
4. Meditation will also raise awareness of past hurts that you have held down for so long and were hoping to forget (Nothing is ever forgotten about. It is stored in your memory bank, your sub-conscious mind!)
5. Don't judge or condemn yourself for having so many thoughts. We have to start somewhere.
6. Allow these thoughts to pass - observe them and allow them to flow, letting them go, just as you would be observing a river flow, without more chatter or input.
7. If you get feeling of elation or feelings of sadness, let it happen, allow all of it to flow through you. Embrace yourself in this process of release and awakening.

By beginning the process of releasing the guilt, the doubt, and the pain, you will begin to see more clearly, you will begin to awaken. This doesn't happen over night or even in a week. It takes a heartfelt decision to want to transform your old way of being, your old identity, to your True Self. It takes willingness and courage to face the past, to get to the source. Be compassionate with yourself and you will succeed!

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

The Great Arises Out of Small Things

The Great Arises Out of Small Things
Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

"Whenever you notice that some form of negativity has arisen within you, look on it not as a failure, but as a helpful signal that is telling you: Wake up. Get out of your mind. Be Present."

"The great arises out of small things that are honored and cared for. Everybody’s life really consists of small things. Greatness is a mental abstraction and a favorite fantasy of the ego. The paradox is that the foundation for greatness is the honoring of the small things in the present moment instead of pursuing the idea of greatness."

"In you, as in each human being, there is a dimension of consciousness far deeper than thought. Love, joy, creative expansion, and lasting inner peace can only come into your life through that unconditioned dimension of consciousness."

~ Eckhart Tolle

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Suspended In the Moment

Suspended In the Moment
Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Man must live suspended in the moment, living fully in the Now.

Complete the past and bless it, otherwise it will keep you in bondage.

Bless the future knowing that it has in store endless joys.

Dig your ditches and live with full expectancy (or faith)

of the miracles and wonders that follow,

and that shall never cease.

There is always plenty on man's pathway:

but it can only be brought into manifestation

through desire, faith, and the spoken word.

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Joy Factor

Joy Factor
Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Your joy factor will remain constant as you are continually refining your ideas of what you want, and that's why it is so important for you to get everybody else out of the equation. They've got their own game going on; they don't understand your game. Give them a break; stop asking them what they think. Start paying attention to how you feel. Joy will be yours immediately, and everything else that you have ever thought would make you happy, will start flowing, seemingly effortlessly, into your experience.
~Abraham

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Confrontation

Confrontation
Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Stepping over what's been held back in your life, broken promises or regrets, as well as resentments, anger, and pain take away your power. To reclaim your power, start with small promises to yourself and KEEP them!

To give you an example, think about a diet or an exercise program. When have you promised yourself that you were going to lose that last 10 or 20 pounds? Yet over and over again you beat yourself up after you break that promise to yourself, saying that you are weak or have no will-power. Then you justify yourself by saying, it's hereditary, it's in my genes, or I'm just like my mother/father, or work/children/friends got in the way. The excuses and stories are endless! But what matters the most, is that your self-esteem and your confidence begin to dwindle.

1. Begin by confronting what is really going on in your life. Take what is happening in the background of your life and bring it to the foreground. FACE your Demon!
2. From that point, be REAL with yourself. Start writing down what your challenges are, and why you break your promises. Again be real with yourself. Stop hiding from the truth!
3. Then ask yourself whether or not you want to continue to live with yourself and your lack of integrity.
4. Ask yourself,"Is it working for me?" And if not, "What do I need to do to make it workable?" and to create more integrity and harmony in your life.
5. Take 3 action steps immediately. Not tomorrow or later on in the week, Now!

For example, write down the days you will be exercising, the exact hours and the exact days. There are no maybe's! If unexpected events come up, you can be flexible, but for now write down exactly when you can do your workout. Set up a plan on what types of meals you will prepare for the next week and create a shopping list where needed. Then go shopping. Cook and freeze the food according to single portions or go and buy healthy frozen meals. Whatever it takes and whatever works. Just Do It Now!

What you hold back in life, broken promises, and regrets are all caused by the lies that you keep telling yourself over and over again. "I can't do it," "I have not will-power," "It's in my genes," etc, etc. This leads to blame, judgment and excuses that weaken you, lowering your self-esteem and confidence.

Deal powerfully with reality through confrontation. Stop stepping over what's holding you back!

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

I Will Survive

I just finished up a great workout listening to Gloria Gaynor. The louder the song the better. It gets you moving quickly and pumps an abundance of blood to your heart and oxygen to your lungs!

I have always loved this song. In my past years, I related it to the dysfunctional relationships I was in. Today, I relate this beautiful song to the distorted ego and the physical identity that can sometimes run-a-muck in my head.

I invite you to take the opportunity, right now, to read these lyrics in relationship with your distorted ego or that physical identity in mind and see how the song resonates with you.

I WILL SURVIVE

First I was afraid
I was petrified
Kept thinking I could never live
without you by my side
But I spent so many nights
thinking how you did me wrong
I grew strong
I learned how to carry on
and so you're back
from outer space
I just walked in to find you here
with that sad look upon your face
I should have changed my stupid lock
I should have made you leave your key
If I had known for just one second
you'd be back to bother me.

Go on now go walk out the door
just turn around now
'cause you're not welcome anymore
weren't you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye
you think I'd crumble
you think I'd lay down and die
Oh no, not I
I will survive
as long as I know how to love
I know I will stay alive
I've got all my life to live
I've got all my love to give
and I'll survive
I will survive.

It took all the strength I had
not to fall apart
kept trying hard to mend
the pieces of my broken heart
and I spent oh so many nights
just feeling sorry for myself
I used to cry
Now I hold my head up high
and you see me
somebody new
I'm not that chained up little person
still in love with you
and so you felt like dropping in
and just expect me to be free
now I'm saving all my loving
for someone who's loving me.

That someone is now me!

~Gloria Gaynor

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

New Opportunity is in the Now

New Opportunity is In the Now
Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

You are the threshold of 'new' opportunity and new energy when you are in the Now. Whatever has happened in the past, or whatever will happen in the future, is all determined by the Now. Therefore, it is important to stay present and focused in your current moment. To change your future, you must be in the present.

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Depth of Now

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

"When you allow your emotions to be, you become aware of the depth of Now. The Now is not about what happens but the field, the space in which it happens."

~Eckhart Tolle

The Game of Life

The Game of Life
Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

When I choose to look at obstacles as the way the game of life is played, my entire perception changes. One from, "Oh my gawd here I go again." The poor me victim mentality, to "How can I make this work for me?" I can now take on this so called obstacle as more of an exciting challenge and as something I CAN deal with!

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

Spirituality

"Spirituality is a basic awareness of 
higher consciousness,

consisting of the nature of spirit, and 
allowing the present moment to be what it is."

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

One Breath, One Body, One Consciousness

Wake Up to Live with Desire Leigh
One Breath, One Body, One Consciousness

"Would you not agree that we are sharing each others breath? And, as we share each others breath, we also share our molecules. And, as we share our molecules, we share our bodies. We are members of One breath, One body, One energy field. We are One informational field, One consciousness. This is not a mystical fact. It is a scientific fact."

~Deepak Chopra

Wake Up to Live with Desiree Leigh

AVATAR, by James Cameron

I have never once ever felt these intense emotions, that I want to share with you, until I watched the movie Avatar, written and directed by James Cameron. While watching the movie, I was ready to give up my entire existence to become a Na'vi, the natives of Pandora, and their entire way of being. The Na'vi are the sapient and sentient race of humanoids indigenous to their Earth-like moon called Pandora.

Mesmerized right from the start, I was in awe, observing the creation of this magical and magnificent feature. I was beyond myself wondering how this man pulled this masterpiece from the depths of his heart directed and guided solely from the Universe's whispers. Life is so amazing and heart warming when you can see the genius of James Cameron shared with the entire world. To create something so extraordinary for the rest of us to observe while sitting in delight, James grasped hold of that unknown place that so many of us are reaching for.

James captured my heart by 'wondrously revealing' the heart's of these beautiful people, the Na'vi, and how they lived 'with' the forest. I'm sure he captured many others heart's too! And although the Na'vi's Hometree was brutally destroyed by man, they never lost belief in Eywa and their people. With faith, the Tree of Souls was saved.

A must see in my books! Thank you James, for sharing your wisdom with us all!