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The Effects of Emotional Abuse

What is emotional abuse?
Emotional abuse is a type of abuse that involves the emotional maltreatment of a child, youth, or adult. Emotional abuse is also termed psychological abuse or mental abuse. It is a form of abuse that affects your psyche - mental and emotional - without the physical abuse.
Emotional abuse is usually done in a very cunning and devious manner, and it may not be obvious to you especially if you had suffered from emotional abuse as a child and or adolescent. Emotional abuse can be difficult to identify due to its subtle nature and may even be looked at as a loving behavior. However, emotional abuse if far from a loving behavior. The abuser acts in a controlling and manipulative manner trying to intimidate, isolate, scare, or threaten the victim. 
Emotional abuse can also look like bullying, passive-aggressive behavior (e.g., backhanded compliments, sulking, refusal to communicate), and negging (dismissive and degrading comments that undermind self-confidence).
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Are You Expecting Too Much From Your Relationships?

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I believe we should have expectations, for sure. If you didn't have expectations, you'd simply be a doormat to everyone. We must also have personal boundaries because we need to take care of ourselves. People can forget, get ornery, and lash out, but you have the right to assertively say something to maintain respect for yourself, and f…

Celebrating Father's Day Without A Father

During father's day, the entire world celebrates fathers which is a wonderful thing when you have a father to acknowledge and celebrate, but what if you don't (or didn't).
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I had a father that was a chronic alcoholic and a wife beater. Growing up in the 60's and 70's, domestic violence/intimate partner violence was a family matter and no one talked about it, but we were definitely "supposed" to respect him out of fear that we'd get beat ourselves. I tried, on-and-off,…

Are You Serving Your Thoughts and Worries or This?

When you're struggling with mental health issues, it's difficult to get out of your head and think about who you're serving. Are you serving your thoughts and your worries - the darkness that keeps you restrained? Or are you serving your presence, inner-state, your divinity? 
When you struggle with mental health issues, you are, typically, caught up in your head most of the time. It's difficult to see this when you're in it. I know I couldn't distinguish the difference when I first started learning how to get present, but if you could just take a few seconds of your time and become present by listening to your breath or focusing on your heart, you'll immediately know or realize a "shift" occurred. This "shift" is a release of tension, even if it was only for a moment, from being in the space of your head to being in your present state of awareness of your entirety. 
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When Will It Ever Be the "Right" Time?

I pulled out a beautiful wooden box where I stored valuable little trinkets from the back of my closet this weekend. My son gave it to me a few years back as a Christmas present. I stored little photos and charms, and just about anything that was tiny, so that I wouldn't lose them. 
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Middle Aged Women and Their Risk for Suicide

Rates of Suicide Increasing
The mental health toll of the pandemic is only beginning, and we have yet to see the full impact of it. The National Center for Health Statistics recently reported that suicide rates increased by 35% between 1999 to 2018 in the USA alone, and it continues to rise.
Suicide Among Middle Aged Females
Among females, suicide rates were highest amidst 45 to 64 years of age with excessive rates being in urban areas. It's a worrying trend for women, and pinpointing the reasons is challenging because the causes are so complex. Risk factors include mental illnesses such as depression, bipolar disorder, substance use problems, and chronic pain. A previous history of childhood abuse or trauma can be a risk factor. Environmental factors such as unemployment, a financial crisis, and a divorce can influence the decision to commit suicide. However, the constant and accumulated stressors of life can be a factor as well; situations, circumstances, hardships, and other probl…

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Logical Decision Making
I like to observe, listen, and ask questions from a distance before I jump in and enroll myself into a program because there are so many online. I spent thousand upon thousand of dollars within the past couple of decades; some being worthy of the cost and others not so much. Many get it right with their advertising, promotions, and marketing, but many also don't produce the results!
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Sexual Trauma Requires Holistic Healing

With sexual trauma from childhood and adolescents, dysfunction is not only physical; it is mental, emotional, spiritual, AND sexual. But the thing with chronic childhood trauma is that it is also developmental; this means that through each developmental stage, the child is affected in a different way. Working with trauma survivors during one particular developmental age, the attention can be focused but with chronic trauma that occurs over one's developmental childhood and adolescent lifespan, healing from the trauma will be long and arduous, as you can only imagine. 
There is a huge gap in the health care system for trauma survivors of sexual abuse and violence and survivors of chronic or cumulative childhood violence. Physical wounds heal. Mental, emotional, sexual, and spiritual wounds are not the same. The abuse in embodied in their spirit, their muscles, and and their living cells. 
The Research
During my masters studies, I recognized that when a woman enters the emergency depar…